Hush Up, Frieda!

Updated: Aug 23, 2021

For those who know me, it is a well-known fact that my tongue may truly be hinged in the middle. I think every report card and every parent-teacher interview my poor Mother had to listen to the complaint that I talked too much. Now, well into my 50's, I am beginning to realize that I don't have to provide an answer to every question posed. I don't need to, or more specifically that I should not have or give an opinion where I don't have a responsibility. When posed with a question to use discernment and take time to ask God to help me answer as my track record on making decisions in my own strength has had less than stellar outcomes.

As I look within and have been taking the time to work on myself instead of trying to change and control everything around me I have been directed to stop reacting and learn to be quiet, pray, and use discernment. When I looked up discernment I was pleasantly surprised that the dictionary actually had a second definition that read " (in Christian context) perception in the absence of judgment with a view to obtaining spiritual guidance and understanding. It went on to say that without providing for a time of healing and discernment, there will be no hope of loving through this present moment without shattering our common life.

My common life has been a string of shattering with absolutely no discernment. I was so busy trying to be right, spewing off at the mouth (without putting any thought or even a moment of prayer into any action) that I am amazed at how far I actually got in life. I know that Jesus intervened and save me because he knew someday I was going to get it and I was worth his time and effort.

If you have read any of my other posts, you will realize that I have lived a majority of my life feeling just tolerated. That is absolutely no excuse for my actions but it was the root lie that twisted my view of myself. God and I are working on many issues. As much as I have hated Covid and how it has affected my life, I have learned to embrace this time as it has forced me to stop, be still, and reflect. I was so busy before keeping my mind full of noise so I wouldn't have to deal with my demons. There is much work to be done but today my focus is on training myself to listen, ponder, pray, and then decide if I am to respond. No more yapping!

There is a saying that is so very true and it says, "Listen and silent are spelled with the same letters. Think about it."

James 1:19 "This you know my beloved brethren, but everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger". Sounds simple enough but when your life has been compromised of hardly listening, never shutting up, and flying off the handle it makes it a bit more difficult. I am so happy that with age came some wisdom but so does becoming just too tired. I no longer have the energy to fight over every little thing that arises.

Proverbs 18:13 "He who gives an answer before he hears, it is folly and shame to him". I have lost count of how many times I have tried to suck back the words that I have carelessly and without any thought been spewed from my mouth. There was no need for them and no good would come from them. Then I spend hours/days/weeks beating myself up over it all.

My tongue is what I have used as my weapon of choice against the world. I hid behind a wall of false security, strength, and boldness when in reality I am nothing more than insecure, weak, and scared. So, for many years I lashed out first so others couldn't hurt me. However, the wall I built to keep others out was nothing more than my own prison cell.

Psalms 46:10 "Be still and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth" and Exodus 14:14 "The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still". These are two verses God provided to show me I don't have to fight. I never had to, but now that I am walking close to God and letting Him have control of my life by being real, the reality of my job is to be still, pray, use discernment and know that he is God, my life has become so much easier.

It is not my job to try to have an answer for every question, especially if the questions are ridiculous. Proverbs 26:4 says, "don't answer the foolish arguments of fools, or you will become as foolish as they are". I have spent enough time being a fool.

Two ears and one mouth, listen more, and talk less. Now don't get too excited this is just the beginning of my journey and I am sure I will still have much to say but with God's guidance and using discernment, it is my hope that all my words will bring Him glory and honor.

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